The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I want a musical about memes.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
