im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Randomize
