theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
