Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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