I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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