the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
