I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
