Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
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