i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
