I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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