i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
