i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
