Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
You don't make any sense
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