He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
