it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Randomize
