All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
She made me pour olive oil on her.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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