she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
what day is it and did you see me today?
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
that may or may not have been my penis.
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