wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
