Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize