Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
