i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize