Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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