omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
