Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
