what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
