I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
