i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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