My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.