Texts From Last Night

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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen

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  (978): Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen http://tfl.nu/ycl6
  Replies (27) Good night (2670) Bad night (995)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.

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  (515): Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn. http://tfl.nu/kzr9
  Replies (28) Good night (982) Bad night (5418)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  He went soft

  (631): View more from New York

  Wait. During?

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.

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  (260): He went soft (631): Wait. During? (260): Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH. http://tfl.nu/18lb
  Replies (99) Good night (986) Bad night (16050)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport

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  (904): taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport http://tfl.nu/zg9o
  Replies (20) Good night (6818) Bad night (953)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Just the budget?

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  (515): I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget... (316): Just the budget? http://tfl.nu/v45e
  Replies (4) Good night (4557) Bad night (1053)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check

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  (847): there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check http://tfl.nu/dzvq
  Replies (7) Good night (4102) Bad night (1372)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?

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  (+44): He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day? http://tfl.nu/3a44
  Replies (14) Good night (3527) Bad night (610)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens

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  (650): Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens http://tfl.nu/mv4i
  Replies (13) Good night (2345) Bad night (1294)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy

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  (315): i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy http://tfl.nu/pdy7
  Replies (9) Good night (2024) Bad night (797)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...

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  (870): Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories... http://tfl.nu/piuz
  Replies (1) Good night (593) Bad night (363)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.

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  (505): Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels. http://tfl.nu/3182
  Replies (3) Good night (310) Bad night (818)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"

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  (906): He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall" http://tfl.nu/x1lu
  Replies (1) Good night (760) Bad night (276)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"

  (917): View more from New York City

  Rigtt?!

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  (718): I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts" (917): Rigtt?! http://tfl.nu/6krm
  Replies (0) Good night (594) Bad night (324)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.

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  (708): I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples. http://tfl.nu/uuho
  Replies (3) Good night (339) Bad night (603)
• Favorite

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?

  (727): View more from Florida

  ME.

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  (980): Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed? (727): ME. http://tfl.nu/931b
  Replies (0) Good night (300) Bad night (493)

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