so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
