TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
