And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
