SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
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