On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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