I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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