Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Less talking, more tequila
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
