3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I just saw a hot homeless man
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
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