I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I want to have your abortion
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Randomize