We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage