i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
