I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize