I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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