I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
