I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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