do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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