Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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