I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize