Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
