I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
