No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
