I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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